Can an entire species win a Darwin award?

The Darwin award is an annual juried presentation of the most unlikely and ridiculous ways people have accidents or make mistakes that kill them.

Homo Sapiens - I'm awarding you the grand prize.  Complete extinction of all oxygen breathing life withing 1500 - 10,000 years.

Game over - I'm calling the game because of rain, lightning, volcano, tsunami, collapsing foodchains, heat, blizzard, tornado, hurricane, flood and blood-red water.  Deforestation, acid rain, heavy-metal leaching into the water supply, habitat destruction, over-farming, over-fishing, over-fucking.

People, this thing can't swing the other way.

This world habitat crisis is well past identified tipping-points, and like water on the stove it is just going to "change states" and create a global environment no longer able to support large life, especially life dependent on oxygen and liquid water.

It is already going global and nobody is innocent. More news is coming daily. The human race is imploding like the Atlanta Braves front office and the planet deserves to be colonized by a better species. 

Dinosaurs ruled the planet for millions of years and were responsible stewards while the humans torched, devoured, and destroyed during their brief 10,000 year tenure and are in the ninth inning with two outs and no one on deck. And we are watching it real time.

The Coconuts in the White House (funny)

Some people are coconuts.

Imagine - you are stranded alone on a desert island, with no fresh water, fishing line, or food.

Then, you discover a pile of coconuts.  You are saved!  Coconuts are full of sweet watery nectar and nutritious pulpy food.  You pile up 35 in an hour.  Surely a boat will pass before you die.

With joy you attack the first one with your trusty Graber knife, one of the big ones...  to pry it open as you have not had a sip of water in almost four days.

Suddenly "SNAP"



OH FUCK THE KNIFE BROKE IN HALF and the blade sails over your head and with a soft splash falls into a bottomless sinkhole full of salt water and a large crocodile.

Those 35 coconuts, they will sit there - full of everything you could ever want or need, and they will with what appears to be great joy, watch you die.

Some people are like that.

Donald Trump and Michael Pence?  Coconuts.  They just want the poor, the homeless, the starving and people who are not "Christian" (click link to explain) to go away and die under a bridge, or better yet get arrested and sent to a nice profitable prison.

Malcolm X (my Father met him as he was a friend of Stokely Carmichael/Kwame Ture) said this one week before he died.

Coconuts.

Read on (funny) - Clinically Insane Idiot-Savant 
Writes open Letter to Mike Pence on his Birthday


Read on:  The Day my Father Met Malcolm X (contains
previously unpublished quote)

Read on:  Message from God to the World - 2018
(New Hope Peace Academy 2018 Essay Award Winner)

Read on:  Link to New Hope Peace Academy Worldwide
and More Articles on Peace, Equality and Tolerance

Everybody Dies

I had a birthday the other day.  I'm old enough that I found it a little irritating.  Then I had a couple of thoughts.

everybody dies.

 

You are dying.  I am dying.  We are dying.  The only sentence in which the personal pronoun form does not modify the terminal meaning.  All of Us are dying.  Everyone is dying.  You yourself and everything you know...  are in the process of dying.

After you get to age 50 or 60 who really cares if you die of pneumonia or the next cancer you are in line for? Hell, your knees hurt, your sight is going and driving gets a little scarier every year. Time to check out of the hotel that is life and hit the revolving door.

The USA wastes incredible time, money and human energy trying to cheat death.  This creates untold human misery due to our dual obsessions of early detection and prolonging life.

Prolonging life for what? They aren't going to give you another five years of being 20 years old.

This healthcare crisis is partly due to our fanatical obsession here in the U.S.A. with medicine - not the good kind of medicine that cures kids and relieves suffering, but the expensive stupid late-in-life kind that tries to pretend people get to live happy California lives forever.

Hogwash.

As soon as I hit 50 I made a firm decision to die of the first damn thing I catch that is strong enough to kill me. Seems like a good way to go.

CLICK HERE for the next humorous essay

CLICK HERE for John's more serious work

Meme Linguistics and the Great American Political Divide

You say this to me:  "I am proud I voted Trump, and I think he is doing a great job.

I hear:  "I am a cruel, evil and vile person - almost subhuman.  You should kill me now, and hunt and kill every person with even a tiny bit of my DNA."

I ask you, how far should a good person go to react to someone with genocidal actions, genocidal votes, and genocidal intent?  How far would I go to prevent Hitler, to prevent slavery and economic genocide, where all the old and weak and poor are starved?

How far should I go to stop the wall?

Honduran child placed in solitary and waterboarded for making unreasonable demands.

6 year old Honduran asylum seeker placed in solitary and waterboarded for demanding she be returned to the same parents she came with.  (this is a clickable link)


(reprint from theonion.com)


CLICKABLE Link to Next Funny Story

Global Warming - A Facebook Perspective

John Hubertz I'm a lifelong student of the sciences, and I care not a bit about the measly five degrees plus or minus that separate dead polar bears and no ice from a new ice age.

Manage

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John Hubertz What I am somewhat concerned about is the tipping-point crossed by mankind sometime between 1917 and 1922, when the percentage of oxygen in earth's atmosphere began to decline.

Manage

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John Hubertz Current predictions are that in less than 2500 years, fire will not burn without supplemental oxygen on planet earth. This is rather unfortunate, especially when you consider that cellular biology is at the microscopic and atomic level, a tiny fire. That means " Oh darn it!" "Gee, the earth will no longer support the existence of oxygen breathing organisms." The regeneration of our oxygen-based biosphere will take an estimated 100,000 to 1,000,000 years, depending on a variety of factors. There you go folks - thanks to the good old USA and a few hundred worldwide corporations, as of the year 4800 or so (a blink in the history of man) we will not be able to live on this planet. Global warming is a talking point for those who would distract us from the real issue, which is overpopulation, predatory capitalism, and the forces of greed that have done this to us all. Yeah, our planet... and for Trump voters 🤔 I should gently remind you that this is our Earth.... and that is the name of the planet your children need to live on?
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Pennsylvania Snow 2017

Pennsylvania Snow, December 27, 2017

"May You Have an Interesting Life"

You know you have had a bit of a journey in the long road that is life, when an internet search of your address includes the same Rehabilitation Facility that is currently occupied by Tiger Woods.  (click image for full size)

Obituary - Gary "Dink" Dye, December 18, 2017. (Indiana)

GARY RANDALL "DINK" DYE

Send Flowers Obituary Guest Book "Gary you will be missed greatly, we love you very much. I..." - Jennings View Sign More Photos View all 2 photos GARY "DINK" RANDALL DYE, 59, of Fort Wayne, passed away Saturday, Dec. 16, 2017 after a brief battle with esophageal cancer. A commercial roofing superintendent, Dink spent the last five decades raising hell and loved booze, guns, motorcycles, and cars 'till the day he died. He loved a simple quiet day at home watching old episodes of "The Andy Griffith Show" and "Moonshiners". He was also a gardener and once grew a garden in the back of an old truck because he didn't feel like tilling the garden that year. He loved cooking and thought everything was better with tabasco sauce. He absolutely adored his grandchildren and put on a tough front but was unable to deny them anything. Gary would have loved knowing that friends and family would stop in at his celebration and re-tell the stories he can no longer tell. Gary will be lovingly remembered by his significant other of 21 years, Tess Beck and his children, Teresa (Michael) Conway, and Tiffani and Emily Beck. Gary will also be fondly remembered by his five grandchildren, Ysabella, Cody, Addison, Caden, and Mila. By his mother, Bertie Dye. By his sisters, Pat Elkins, Melissa (David) Shepherd, and Susan (Roger) Hindel. By his brothers, Cleatis (Alice), Michael (Tammy), and Carlos (Darlene) Dye. And by his many cousins and nieces and nephews. And by his faithful albeit cantankerous Jack Russell-Chihuahua mix, Ditto. He was preceded in death by his brother, Mark, and his father, Carlos J. Dye. A short memorial service and celebration of life is 6 p.m. Wednesday, Dec. 20, 2017 at Midwest Funeral Home & Cremation Society, 4602 Newaygo Road, Fort Wayne, Ind., with visitation from 4 to 6 p.m. Continue Reading: The Mister Obvious Hall of Fame (page down for more stories)

From Facebook – December, 2017

Subject:  Sexual Abuse, Human Nature, and the death of the planet Earth

Introductory question:  Is it possible for an entire species to win a Darwin Award? (chlorinating the gene pool since 1994)

Bottom of Form

David d****

November 29 at 9:09pm · 

People, this thing can swing the other way. I don’t know too many men that weren’t cornered in the copy room, groped at a corporate team building session, or were otherwise exposed to an awkward, clumsy pass by a coworker somewhere along the way. Can you imagine being pushed on the bed by someone like a horny Elizabeth Warren, or Hillary when you’re trying to get a career defining power point presentation ready? This is going global and nobody is innocent. More are coming out daily. The human race is imploding like the Atlanta Braves front office and the planet deserves to be colonized by a better species. Dinosaurs ruled the planet for millions of years and were responsible stewards while the humans torched, devoured, and destroyed during their brief 10,000 year tenure and are in the ninth inning with two outs and no one on deck. And we are watching it real time.

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Richard Welsch So basically I should be in jail

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 Rick, I've never personally seen you anything other than an absolute perfect gentleman. However, if what you are saying is true, you'd make an excellent arrogant, unrepentant Democrat serial groping senator that views women merely as a slab of meat right there in your home state of Minnesota and use your comedic skills to laugh your way out of it - and have your fans buy into it big time.

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 · Reply · November 30 at 7:54pm

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Jeff Gulick https://g.co/kgs/NrvSaN

Little Girls

Song by Oingo Boingo

GOOGLE.COM

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 · Reply · November 30 at 10:50pm

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Eric Smith Because of my looks and excellent physical shape I have faced this my entire career.

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 · Reply · December 1 at 9:03am

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John Hubertz David, I'm going to copy this post to my Blog (the Mister Obvious Hall of Fame) and spread this message of American truth to the world. As always, you remain a man of wisdom and incredible skill with the written word.